Thursday, October 30, 2008

Outrage! Outrage! Outrage!!!!1!

Twenty seven thousand people.

Twenty seven thousand people??

Really?

Admittedly, I’m perhaps not the best person to have any perspective on this, but seriously? You’d think that Russell Brand and Jonathon Ross had taken it in turns to dry-rape the Pope while giving Nazi salutes and murdering puppies.

Thank the gods for the Daily Mail, that’s all I can say. Otherwise we would never have known that a man who used to be on the telly agreed to be interviewed on the radio and gave them his phone number and then, presumably, popped out for ten minutes to distribute alms to the poor and cure the sick, and some men, one of whom had shagged his pure, innocent stripper-in-a-group-called-Satanic-Sluts granddaughter, left messages pertaining to this on his answerphone and lots of people heard it go out on the radio and didn’t mind at all and the sweet, kindly grandfather himself didn’t even seem to mind that much but, really, we should all storm the BBC with flaming torches and pitchforks and demand that the heads of the two men who haven’t really done anything much are immediately displayed on pointy sticks in Reception as a warning to all those evil, wicked purveyors of filth whose sole intention is to bring about the downfall of civilisation as we know it via that all-powerful, omniscient medium of Light Entertainment that we will not stand for this.

I’ll leave the last word on the subject to the estimable “Hughes, Coventry” who was so incensed that he had to rush to his computer a full three days after the "story" broke and let the BBC know exactly how much people have been offended:

Where have all the roll models gone. What we need is good old fashioned standards............ Get rid of this sick filth that is invading our lives, take them off the air permentantly

Well done that man. I am confident that you speak for all of us.

*breathes*

UPDATE: Now over thirty thousand people have complained! How will we survive this?!

8 Comments:

Blogger garfer chimed in with...

The cliche 'storm in a teacup' springs to mind.

Don't have much time for either of them meself, but this is completely out of proportion.

Poor Wossy. He may be a knob but he doesn't deserve this.

30 October, 2008 11:46  
Blogger Betty chimed in with...

I wonder if they're both going to be stoned to death in the street? Will they have to leave the country, have plastic surgery and move to Brazil?

Hmm. I listened to it and thought it was quite funny.

...

...

I don't think I should've admitted to that.

30 October, 2008 11:57  
Blogger Geoff chimed in with...

That poor old man, though.

Who says his grandaughter is the one they should be apologising to.

The grandaughter who is sponsored by The Sun to tell her non-story.

"Russell shouted "Que?" in bed."

Good on him!

30 October, 2008 13:05  
OpenID Arabella chimed in with...

Those were the days - when you had to sneak into a record shop and buy a Derk and Clive LP and listen to it at home with the front room door shut. Clandestine and funnier for it. Better looking too.

30 October, 2008 15:16  
Blogger Mephitis chimed in with...

@ Geoff, if she had wanted to do a kiss-and-tell about sleeping with Brand, she could have at the time, 2 years ago.

Now it's come out, she might as well sell her story, she'd be mad not to.

@ Surly, glad to see you blogging here again. :)

30 October, 2008 17:03  
Blogger llewtrah chimed in with...

Poor woman, to think she slept with that creature. I wouldn't touch Brand with a barge pole if it was the last male on the planet. Brand falls into my "rather shag-a-dog" category. I find the sight of him revolting.

Someone mentioned on BBC News 24 that it's about time Ross got reined in.

30 October, 2008 17:35  
Blogger FirstNations chimed in with...

Thank God I now know what is responsible for the current sorry state of affairs in this miserable world. The veil has been lifted; the fog has blown away. Everyone in America was shocked-SHOCKED AND APPALLED- when this huge story broke. People wandered dazed in the streets. Like broken toys. A lone voice sobbed in the distance.



I'll stop now, point having been made etc.

welcome back, btw. bout fucking time.

30 October, 2008 18:02  
Blogger longcat chimed in with...

well how lovely to hear your voice again (not that i can hear it) i'm just in the middle of a very enjoyable dawn of the dead (1978), and i've just made a cracking little experimental film...

and here you are... where you used to be, i would never of known if you hadn't put the news on the other one,

now of course i have to change my bookmarks thingamajig,

nice to have you back x

01 November, 2008 01:00  

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