Mats: my thoughts
It’s been a troublesome sort of day.
Despite the fact that, as far as I can tell, we appear to have imagined buying a house (still no completion date and I am convinced that the whole thing has been an elaborate hoax), I am nevertheless compelled to spend my working hours trawling the internet for all manner of household items. Today has been frustrating. I have ordered the wooden duckboards for the shower room and bathroom (I am firm in my belief that bath mats have no place in a carpeted bathroom, and we are having a carpeted bathroom as the purchase of the house has bankrupted us so spectacularly that we can’t afford tiled floors for oh, about twenty years or so), sourced some rather lovely linen baskets and worked out that towels for the whole house will come in at the bewildering price of ninety five pounds. But still, one item eludes me.
Pedestal mats for the loo are, I will concede, horrid. They put me in mind of loo seat covers, and crinoline ladies who perch atop the cistern protecting the modesty of any visiting clergymen or members of the WI from the shameful sight of the spare loo roll, and sickly lavender air fresheners. They are horrid. But again, with the carpeted bathrooms, and the Small People, and the boys who can’t just wee in the loo, oh no, and why would they when there’s a whole room full of absorbent floor covering to sprinkle, I feel that a mat of some sort is a necessity. Something very plain, the same colour as the carpet, that can be popped through the wash every so often, thereby effortlessly reducing the possibility of the bathroom carpet attracting tomcats and homeless people. Easy, you might think. With the whole world only a Google away, surely such an item (or three items, in this case) can be easily procured.
Well, you’d be wrong. I can have bath mats. There are millions to choose from. Fluffy ones, rubber ones that look like manhole covers, ones with seashells, or beach huts, or feet, or (worryingly, given my propensity for irrational fears) sharks on them. Mats to go next to the bath, in the bath, in the shower; gazillions of them. Pedestal mats though? Not a hope. In the whole, entire world of online shopping I found less than ten. Of these meagre pickings, all except one came as part of a set with a bath mat. As we have established, I don’t need a bath mat. I especially don’t need three bath mats, and I refuse to buy them in order to also acquire a pedestal mat. The one that came by itself bore the legend: “Beer. Good To the Last Drop”, and I really don’t think it would lend anything to the oasis of taste and restraint that our house will be. So, what the hell do I do now?
You have no idea how sorry I am for making you read four hundred and eighty-nine words about how I can’t find a mat to keep piss off the carpet. But still. Any ideas?
Despite the fact that, as far as I can tell, we appear to have imagined buying a house (still no completion date and I am convinced that the whole thing has been an elaborate hoax), I am nevertheless compelled to spend my working hours trawling the internet for all manner of household items. Today has been frustrating. I have ordered the wooden duckboards for the shower room and bathroom (I am firm in my belief that bath mats have no place in a carpeted bathroom, and we are having a carpeted bathroom as the purchase of the house has bankrupted us so spectacularly that we can’t afford tiled floors for oh, about twenty years or so), sourced some rather lovely linen baskets and worked out that towels for the whole house will come in at the bewildering price of ninety five pounds. But still, one item eludes me.
Pedestal mats for the loo are, I will concede, horrid. They put me in mind of loo seat covers, and crinoline ladies who perch atop the cistern protecting the modesty of any visiting clergymen or members of the WI from the shameful sight of the spare loo roll, and sickly lavender air fresheners. They are horrid. But again, with the carpeted bathrooms, and the Small People, and the boys who can’t just wee in the loo, oh no, and why would they when there’s a whole room full of absorbent floor covering to sprinkle, I feel that a mat of some sort is a necessity. Something very plain, the same colour as the carpet, that can be popped through the wash every so often, thereby effortlessly reducing the possibility of the bathroom carpet attracting tomcats and homeless people. Easy, you might think. With the whole world only a Google away, surely such an item (or three items, in this case) can be easily procured.
Well, you’d be wrong. I can have bath mats. There are millions to choose from. Fluffy ones, rubber ones that look like manhole covers, ones with seashells, or beach huts, or feet, or (worryingly, given my propensity for irrational fears) sharks on them. Mats to go next to the bath, in the bath, in the shower; gazillions of them. Pedestal mats though? Not a hope. In the whole, entire world of online shopping I found less than ten. Of these meagre pickings, all except one came as part of a set with a bath mat. As we have established, I don’t need a bath mat. I especially don’t need three bath mats, and I refuse to buy them in order to also acquire a pedestal mat. The one that came by itself bore the legend: “Beer. Good To the Last Drop”, and I really don’t think it would lend anything to the oasis of taste and restraint that our house will be. So, what the hell do I do now?
You have no idea how sorry I am for making you read four hundred and eighty-nine words about how I can’t find a mat to keep piss off the carpet. But still. Any ideas?
posted by surly girl at 7:54 pm
12 Comments:
carpet in bathrooms? Eewe.
Says he who lives in a house with three bathrooms and each one has fucking carpet in it.
I crave cheap plastic flooring.
Asda sorted me out a treat.
Thank you for the laugh: 'we appear to have imagined buying the house'. Well if you will drink on a weeknight...
Does get a bit like that when the world goes mad and forgets you exist and have needs. Hope it gets sorted immediately!
Not even in John Lewis? I'm shocked. Am also a little concerned that your carpets will get very wet with people getting into and out of the bath. Would you be willing to reconsider your stance on bath mats?
By the way - three bathrooms?
*seething jealousy*
In the exact same dilemma, I could find NOTHING on the Internet.
I was forced to visit actual stores. It was strange and disconcerting.
What belladonna said. A quick glance at Argos proves your point, there are quite a few pedestals but all come with bath mats.
here ya go.
http://www.kmart.com/catalog/category.jsp?N=682&Ne=466&pCategoryId=466&categoryId=682
Martha Stewart Everyday 4-Star Contour Bath Rug
Sale: $11.69
Sale Ends Saturday
they'll ship!
whinger has the answer. they are sold in actual stores sg.
maybe you could knit some?
*runs away*
Buy a carpet offcut. Cut out the U-shaped piece to leave a place for the pedastle.
Use the U-shaped piece as a bog-roll cover ;-)
Oh, and install a pissoir for poorly-aiming gents....
Leave a cork floating in the toilet, this provides an aiming point and never fails.
Make everyone piss in the back garden. Then you don't even have to clean your 3 toilets.
try woolworths. And what Pash said about John Lewis. Or buy a set and sell the bathmat on ebay?
I found a bath RUG at a joint called Kitchens Inc, or something like that. It seems to be a chain, maybe there's one in the UK. The rug looks like, well, just a beige rug and wears and washes well.
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