Irrational
No. 596 in an interchangeable list of thousands of irrational fears is the fear that I might drown. It's literally the worst thing I can think of. Apart from suffocating, or burning, or getting shot, or being in a plane crash, or being trampled to death by cows*, or getting run over. But the really irrational part of my drowning fear (I am not much fun to be around when on a ship, what with my constant checking of how big the waves are, my endless obsession with how big they might get and my conviction that we are sinking) is that sometimes I worry that I could drown while drinking a glass of water. You know when you're really, really thirsty? So you get a great big glass of water? Well sometimes I'm so thirsty that I can't stop drinking the water even though I really, really need to breathe. And all the while I'm thinking "blimey, I really need to breathe. So I should stop drinking for a second and breathe, probably". Except I can't stop. I'm guessing that I probably can't actually drown this way, but it's always scary** nonetheless.
Carry on.
* This happens. It happens quite a lot. Cows are scary. Fact.
** What?? So there aren't things that you find scary that would make me point at you and laugh?
Carry on.
* This happens. It happens quite a lot. Cows are scary. Fact.
** What?? So there aren't things that you find scary that would make me point at you and laugh?
22 Comments:
Woah, you think too much girl. Chill out, have a vodka, try not to think of the ensuing liver damage...
goodness
first your obsession with the hoffmeister, then your seeing familiar people all around and now THIS
worried
p.s. but i agree about the cows
I'm always terrified that I'm going to drown in the bath, so I stopped taking baths.
But I do shower daily. Honest :)
You need to learn how to breath through your ears hon...that's a skill that will have many benefits !!!!!
Um, that's definitely crossed the bondaries into irrational.
I'm not scared of anything.
(Except frisbees. And snowballs obviously.)
I'm with you on the drowning thing. I'd rather go almost any other way. You'd make a good professional sailor - apparently it's a pre-requisite. To be scared of water. Stops you falling in.
I'm more scared of the covers. When they get over your face they could easily suffocate you. Beware.
My sister tells me that this fear goes back to my childhood when she hid me in the dirty washing basket under the dirty washing during a game of hide and seek.
Also if I grow a fringe, or my hair hangs in my face in any way I start feeling I might suffocate.
Small spaces of any kind. Narrow corridors. Don't even make me think about pot-holing ... why would anybody choose to do that?
I'm quite worried about comedy anvils falling from the sky. Thus I drive everywhere and try not to expose my head too often.
I can drink water without breaking into a sweat, tho.
Breath through your arse. But not when your in the bath, obviously. That'd be daft. You can exhale through your arse quite safely though.
I've read numerous stories of people drowning by drinking too much water - about 4 litres is quite sufficient, I've heard. Scary eh?
So are you going to do some kind of expirement and try drinking yourself to just before drowning point?
Yes, go on. Try it and let us know what it was like!
I'm scared of that too which is why I'm so desiccated and wrinkly. Try drinking with a straw.
I'm scared of you. Really.
Sweet SG -- it's going to be okay. Clearly you'd splutter the water all over in a very unattractive way prior to the ACTUAL drowning.
And cows are beautiful.
And delicious.
You must have a very rough breed of cow over there.
You can drown in very little water but I'm quite sure that all that practice with drinking beer will make you quite safe around drinking water!
*quietly slips some Prozac into sg's water*
KG - you obviously don't know Surly if you think Prozac to be sufficient.
I'm also scared of cows, but not as much as goats, geese and swans. And chickens. And turkeys. And pigeons. Most birds actually.
And sheep make me nervous.
I'm scared of those enormous things that get in and crash witlessly around the lightbulbs and then fall down and lie upside down waving their legs threateningly..pretending to be helpless. Urgh! May bugs or June bugs or whatever they're called.
but Whinger's right. You're quite safe.
It's true about cows though. They're weird.
Oh please do the taking off your clothes one, Spindleshanks!
Then post pics for us all too see/throw darts at/pin the tail on.
Ah Mig - you're talking about the things we call Billywitches around these parts ... (East Anglia) ... They also fly into your hair and get stuck. You are right to fear them - they are evil.
yes yes! cows are EVIL!
uxakxn: you can ask them
I'm sure I read somewhere that someone drowned because they drank too much water... Silly git!
They should've drunk gin then they would've passed out before all their internal organs became full.
Probably of little comfort, but I know what you mean about breathing and drinking water. When your head goes swimmy (I can't think of a better word to describe it) and you want to gasp for air at the exact moment that you're swallowing a mouthful of water.
yes!! that's it exactly, tr.
i wonder if i have any more neuroses that you can identify with and thus make me feel better about....
Post a Comment
<< Home