Friday, October 28, 2005

Language: Frequent, Strong

Fuck it. Fuck it all, and then fuck it again for good measure.

The Other Half has been in Tenerife on business since Monday. He's been living in relative squalor, with no bedding or towels and intermittent loo roll. He was due home this evening - Small Person and I were supposed to go to the airport to collect him and his colleague. We were both excited; her because it was an adventure and she's missed him, me because since he's been away I've been in a sort of trance. Seriously, it's like my arm fell off or something. I can't sleep (although this might be because Stephen fucking Hawking woke me up with ear-bleed tv at 12.45 am...only turning it off at 1am when I hammered on his front door, hopefully scaring the bejesus out of him in the process. The cunt..), I can't eat, I don't know what I'm doing. So anyway, tonight was supposed to involve me picking them up from the airport then dropping them at their respective homes, safe in the knowledge that at some point tomorrow I get a huge, huge cuddle and the security of him being home for a couple of months. Instead, just as we're heading out of town, I get a phone call explaining that they've missed the flight. It was delayed so they were in the cafeteria watching the screens. It went from "delayed" to "boarding, last call" and when they got to the gate it had gone. It transpired that the Iberia staff had been paging them but, in the words of one of the mouth-breathing fucktards on the Iberia desk "the speakers don't work by the cafeteria". Oh well, fuck you very much, Iberia. Easyjet have three no-shows on a flight into the UK but for some arcane reason they are unable to resell the seats. This is beyond me - they could effectively charge three times the price and they'd sell them - tonight anyway. So at the moment our brave boys are sitting on the floor in Madrid airport hoping to make standby on a midnight flight into Heathrow. Should this come off (and should they be able to secure a hire car at this end), I can expect a tired and dishevelled Other Half on my doorstep at around 4am tomorrow. If not, there's a possibility of getting into Gatwick via Lisbon at 13.oo tomorrow (I am in contact with Colleague's girlfriend who is a good friend of mine and who is playing travel agent on her enviable broadband connection attempting to source an alternative). Failing that, I'll see him sometime on Tuesday. It may yet come to that - the Lisbon/Gatwick flight is over seven hundred quid each although I expect the company credit card will take the necessary battering.

Bottom line is this. I've been on my own since Monday (apart from Small Person who has been a tower of strength this evening - she bravely stayed up til 9pm to keep me company). I may yet be on my own for another three nights. I do not function well on my own. I need that man to come home, and soon. Do you hear me, Iberia? Easyjet? These are people and they need to be home. I know that on the grand scale of things this is vastly insignificant. But, fuck it. It's my blog and I'll whine if I want to.

That is all.


Blogger Urban Chick chimed in with...

my god, i'd be angry

poor you

i hate being on my tod too so i can totally sympathise

hope he gets back in the early hours of tomorrow

and poor SP - it's not so easy to understand the stooopidity of the modern world, or maybe it is? maybe littlies have an edge here: why is he stuck in spain? a bloody good question, in this case

28 October, 2005 22:18  
Blogger Kyahgirl chimed in with...

damn right sg, its your blog and you can whine if you want to. Fuck the airlines.

Hope OH gets home soon.

28 October, 2005 22:39  
Blogger Ant chimed in with...

Fuck and bollocks to it all.

Carry on.

28 October, 2005 23:01  
Blogger Homer chimed in with...

You are a world class swearer. Well done.

29 October, 2005 08:49  
Blogger Urban Chick chimed in with...

is he back? hope so...

29 October, 2005 10:26  
Blogger Mike chimed in with...

A little more wine makes for a little less whine. For a while anyway.

29 October, 2005 11:14  
Blogger Tabby Rabbit chimed in with...

After seeing many a blog with the uptight disclaimer "abusive language will not be tolerated here", it's good to see one that encourages it. Am inspired - plan to use the phrase "fuck you very much", when out and about today (only where deserved, naturally).

29 October, 2005 11:40  
Anonymous Other Half chimed in with...

Good news, we were wait listed for the last London flight out of Madrid and although they made us sweat until the last minute we made it. Turns out hte flight was far from full either, wankers !

Finally collapsed through the door at 5am this morning having had to suffer a Muslim cabbie extolling the virtues of Ramadan for the trip back from the airport.

Still, it was all worth it as there was SG waiting for me when I opened the door and I got the sweetest cuddle from SP in the morning too.

All is now right with the Surly world. We plan to party in town tonight to celebrate my return from my adventures.

29 October, 2005 13:27  
Blogger surly girl chimed in with...

so there you have it - a happy ending. i woke up at 4am and just sort of paced the floor for an hour and just after 5am a very tired bear made an entrance. hurray!

was a very satisfying post to write tho - i fucking love swearing, me.

29 October, 2005 13:55  
Blogger Urban Chick chimed in with...

(i've emailed you on your hotmail addy btw - take a look, will ya? UC)

glad OH is back - yay!

29 October, 2005 15:13  
Blogger FUNKYBROWNCHICK chimed in with...

Yay!!! Glad that's all behind you.

29 October, 2005 16:27  
Blogger elvira black chimed in with...

As we like to say in new york--fuckin' phenomenal! And the Other Half's post about the Muslim cabblie--LMAO! So glad everything turned out ok in the end. It's kind of like when you take an umbrella it never rains--getting pissed can be a kind of disaster insurance all it's own. Know what I'm sayin'? No? well, never mind...

29 October, 2005 19:26  
Blogger mig bardsley chimed in with...

Sharp, clever, funny, honest, brave.
And I'm too knackered tonight to read as much as I wanted. got grandchild waking us up at dawn.
Glad you got happy ending!

30 October, 2005 00:05  
Blogger Yidchick chimed in with...

Fuckedy fuck, thinking of you!

30 October, 2005 11:04  
Blogger Elle chimed in with...

I love happy endings.

And other people swearing.

And your blog.

30 October, 2005 16:07  
Blogger Clare chimed in with...

Is it really Stephen Hawking? I tried following the link but it didn't work...

Sorry. I'm new here.

01 November, 2005 17:34  
Blogger surly girl chimed in with...

hi clare, and welcome. the link is now fixed for your viewing pleasure. just goes to show that nobody ever actually reads this blog - i make these comments up myself, you know.

carry on.

01 November, 2005 19:12  

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