Friday, September 23, 2005

Something for the weekend?

This weekend features a rather large family gathering. Since it's at my father's house and my mother is not involved it will be more like this than this. At least that's the plan. Joining myself, the Other Half (no Small Person as the Ex is a selfish twat), Fifi Sis, her Other Half and the Minxes, Younger Sis and Unsuitable Terry and my father and stepmother will be Australia Sis and Controlling Husband. This is where it could get interesting. Controlling Husband is of the sort that demands a strict information filter on the part of Australia Sis, as evident in her reluctance to disclose that either Fifi or myself had new Other Halves following our respective marriage breakups last year. Quite how Fifi was supposed to conceal the existence of Smallest Minx during any subsequent get-togethers was the subject of much speculation. Australia Sis and Controlling Husband have been given the only spare room with more than one bed (even though it would be much better suited to, say, a couple and their two small children) as CH "doesn't like them to spend a night apart". I rather suspect that the presence in the house of not one but two scoundrels who have tempted wives from their marital bonds may have more to do with it - perhaps AS' moral welfare is thought to be at stake, what with the presumed-on-CH's-part midnight prowling and all. When AS visited on her own last year there were daily two hour phone calls from CH, in which he demanded step-by-step details of anyone she'd come into contact with that day as reassurance that her trip had not been an elaborate cover-up of her real intention to spend her holiday entertaining a succession of anonymous men in the Gatwick Travelodge. It's a bit of a worry. And this weekend is the first time that most of us will have met him, and I'm just not sure how it'll pan out.

And there had better be Pineapple Fridge Cake or I'm really going to sulk.


Blogger patroclus chimed in with...

Sounds like a right old lark. Have fun! I'm already looking forward to reading the in-depth deconstruction next week.

23 September, 2005 15:32  
Anonymous Other Half chimed in with...

I'm looking forward to being studiously ignored by CH...that will make for an interesting atmosphere. I shall take solace in alcohol and the chance to renew acquaintances with Fifi Sis and her football mad other half, which is always fun.

23 September, 2005 15:41  
Blogger Kyahgirl chimed in with...

Sounds like CH might be in for a bit of a wild ride.
Can't wait to hear about it. :-)

23 September, 2005 16:26  
Blogger Whinger chimed in with...

I don't know what a Pineapple Fridge Cake is, but suddenly I must have it. All to myself.

23 September, 2005 16:39  
Blogger surly girl chimed in with...

it's a sort of cheesecakey thing but softer, with a biscuit base (i would sell my soul to the devil if i got to eat biscuit base every day)and, well, pineapple on it.

and there won't be any left over as the minute we get there i'm going to stick my face in it and not look up until it's all gone. that's assuming there is one of course. if there isn't i will turn on my heel and flounce out in the manner of margot from the good life.

23 September, 2005 17:00  
Blogger The Saturnyne chimed in with...

Not Margot from the Good Life!


Personally, i've developed my very own flouncey style, it usually involves accidentally walking into very hard solid objects midway through, followed by equally flouncey clutching at face and fountains of flouncey blood, depending on how sharp the aforementioned objects are.

Never fails to grab peoples attention...


23 September, 2005 18:12  
Blogger Betty chimed in with...

Well that CH sounds like a right c*nt. Perhaps a few choice words would be in order there (not that I'm stirring it of course)(best to take the opposite advice to any I offer in fact). Best of luck.

23 September, 2005 19:45  
Blogger spindleshanks chimed in with...

looking forward to more CH and clash of the surly family stories - am gripped.

23 September, 2005 20:11  
Blogger Urban Chick chimed in with...

stop it! i haven't done the family tree diagram yet and now i am even more befuddled...

(will you save some pineapple fridge cake for me btw?)

23 September, 2005 21:12  
Blogger elvira black chimed in with...

I have this heady feeling of traveling backward in time, as I'm just reading this post after reading the one after it, so I almost feel like I can read the future. So I know more now than the people who wrote these other comments knew at the time they wrote it. I feel so...well...omniscient! Or something.

25 September, 2005 20:46  
Blogger surly girl chimed in with...

ooh, when unsuitable terry brought the peas to the dinner table twice last night without taking them away in the interim. and three of us saw that....

25 September, 2005 20:49  
Blogger elvira black chimed in with...

Leatherface, the heartwarming early years? Oh dear lord.

25 September, 2005 21:01  
Blogger surly girl chimed in with...

takes all sorts...!!

25 September, 2005 22:19  

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